Philadelphia Personal Matchmakers How to Handle Your New Single Status
While your heartbreak is still fresh, there are certain things you could do to make things worse. Today, our Philadelphia matchmaking team here at Philadelphia Singles will show you what you must avoid after a recent breakup.
After the drama, the tears, and the pain caused by a breakup, you might find yourself in a slump. Being single might be a completely new feeling to you. The “us” status is now “me,” and our Philadelphia personal matchmakers know can be very tough to handle.
When you think of someone who has recently become single, your typical thought is of them being locked in their room, eating lots of ice-cream, watching sad movies, and drinking wine or alcohol, right? Well, our Philadelphia personal matchmakers are here to save you from that depressing scenario. After all, we all know that is not a healthy way to end up.
You need to stay away from that path at all costs. A breakup doesn’t necessarily mean the end of the world. In fact, it’s a new beginning for you. Don’t ruin the new start of a chapter of your life by burying yourself in sadness.
What Should You Avoid Doing When You Break Up
Aside from wallowing in self-pity, there are many other things you need to refrain from doing. Today, our Philadelphia personal matchmakers will tell you what to avoid after you recently become single. We’re here to help you move on in a safe and positive way.
Who is going to go shopping with me? Who is going to cuddle me at night? Who is going to be there to support me? Who is going to love me? Those are some of the questions that might be flowing through your mind when you recently become single, and that’s normal, but when all these questions and doubts start to pile up, you may start to panic.
You need to try to get a grip over your feelings. And as hard as it might be, you need to understand what you’re feeling and allow yourself to experience what you have lost. Remember that a breakup isn’t the end of the world, you are just walking away from someone who once filled a chapter of your life.
2. Pointing Fingers
It takes two people to make a relationship successful. Blaming yourself for the breakup isn’t going to make anything better. You’ll just end up with a lot of regret that shouldn’t be there to begin with.
On the other hand, blaming your ex isn’t going to do you any good either. It’s just going to make you resentful. During harsh times like this, it’s best to accept the fact that both of you did what you could and there wasn’t anything else either of you could have done differently that would have prevented what happened. Some things just aren’t meant to be.
3. Spending Too Much Time by Yourself
When a breakup happens, it’s always best to be surrounded by people who cheer you up. Being alone during times like this can open you up for unhealthy thoughts. In the middle of all your sadness, it’s easy to start believing you were the one in the wrong, and our Philadelphia personal matchmakers know this can damage your self-esteem.
During times like this, it’s best to be surrounded by friends and family, the people who can lend you an ear or give you advice.
4. Talking Excessively about Your Ex
Your friends are going to be there to help you get through these bad times, but you need to remember that everyone has a limit on how much they can handle. For the first few days or weeks, it’s okay to vent about your emotions. Your friends will understand and they’ll do whatever they can to cheer you up.
However, you can’t expect your friends to be the recipients of your rants forever. They want to hang out with you without having to hear stories about your ex or how devastated you are.
5. Letting Yourself Go
You lost the person you love the most, but that does not mean the rest of your life needs to be lost as well. You’re allowed a certain amount of grieving time, but you should not let the grieving time take over your life. Never neglect work, friends, family, or your passions.
Being single will definitely hurt at first, but you can’t stop living your life. It’s those hobbies and activities that are going to keep you busy from thinking about your breakup. You should not let the breakup get in the way of accomplishing your goals. If you need to, add more activities to your life to keep busy and continue living and learning.
6. Holding onto Their Things
Every time you hug that teddy bear your ex gave you, it’s going to bring back memories. But every time you open your eyes, you’re just going to be sitting there holding a teddy bear. Holding onto their stuff will prevent you from moving on. You need to give yourself a day or so to gather all their stuff. Reminisce if you like, or even cry it out, but at the end of the day, it’s important to get rid of all their things.
7. Revisiting Old Spots
Unless you want to cry your eyes out, try to steer clear of spots you both used to frequent together. It will only bring back memories of all the good times you spent with one another. Stay away from those places until you are ready to create new memories.
8. Stalking Them Online
At some point, you might be curious to see what they’re up to, and that’s where your good old friend, Facebook, comes into play. However, you need to be prepared that your ex might have handled the breakup completely different than you. If you see them moving on with their life, it’s going to hurt. Our Philadelphia personal matchmakers encourage you to unfollow them or block them from your social media accounts.
9. Using Someone Else to Get Over Them
Ah, the infamous rebound relationship. A breakup can make anyone feel unattractive, and we know it’s the reason most people turn to the first person who gives them some attention. But before you hook up with a stranger or a friend from the office, stop. You need to consider their feelings. Don’t just use them because you want to feel better. At the end of the day, that relationship is never going to work out.
Avoid all these things from our Philadelphia personal matchmakers on the road to recovery. Don’t worry, you will slip up from time to time, but just get back up and avoid the temptations we have mentioned above.
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